True story: I went to a shitty private highschool that was also a boarding school, which was attended by this kind of squishy pompous russian kid named Anatoliy. Anatoliy didn’t have much going for him socially in most regards, and most of the students mocked him overtly for his accent, as well as for his shoes (which were very ugly indeed). Most of the kids who’d get picked on just kind of accepted their assignations to the lowest grueling rung, but Anatoliy was not going to stand for this. Anatoliy had a plan.
One day, in US history, an argument arose about the constitution, which of course almost nobody had done the reading on. I was sitting across the room (facing the clock and the door, as always), and was therefore granted the unique pleasure of watching his ascension unfold. As the argument grew lengthier and more desperately convoluted, led by a few of the more egocentric jocks whose grades were most reliant on participation points, the rest of us, including the incompetent teacher, sat back in exasperation. Anatoliy, who in fact often participated in discussions, but never seriously (every statement was opened with “let me practice my english”), remained silent. He merely sat back and steepled his fingers, a faint smile creeping across his lips.
As the dickwaving reached a fever pitch, he stood up and slammed his fist on the table. The room went DEAD SILENT.
“ALL OF YOU ARE WRONG,” he proclaimed, and proceeded to extract a copy of the constitution of the united states of america from the inside breast pocket of his blazer, and read us the very passage that definitively answered the question that everyone had been arguing about.
The class went SILENT, and then roared with applause. Nobody ever disrespected that kid again.